My earliest memory with the month of August is from early school days when we celebrated Independence Day at the Residency/Political Office in Gangtok without much knowledge of what was in store two decades later Sikkim fully merged to be the 22nd state of the Indian Union. Another two decades after this historical event and as the Secretary of the Cultural Affairs and Heritage, the nodal department it was a rare privilege for me to organize one month-long state-wide concluding functions for the year-long celebrations of the 50 Years of India's Independence. During the year a cultural troupe under the aegis of Nepal Bhasha Manka Khala: from Kathmandu was in the state capital on invitation of the State Government.  For the first time ever not only the Newars in Sikkim but others also could get a taste of rich cultural extravaganza of the Newar civilization. People who  came even from remote corners of Sikkim and braved the cold rainy winter evening of December 13 and 14 felt amply rewarded. Otherwise they would have missed once in a lifetime such a golden opportunity. During the launch of 'The Newars Worldwide - Connecting the Dots' in March 2016 in Kathmandu, this author had acknowledged and felicitated the duo who led the troupe two decades ago in 1997 - Padma Ratna Tuladhar and Naresh Bir Shakya. Golden Jubilee of India's Independence had the State level closing ceremonies in a befitting manner in the capital Gangtok where the celebrations continued all day long that Independence Day 1998 with a cultural show held in the evening inside the Indoor Gymnasium of the Paljor Stadium in the august presence of state dignitaries. So much was the vim and vigour in the audience mesmerized by the performance of various local and guest artistes in the musical evening that it continued till wee hours. We had declared the function officially closed at the strike of the midnight by bursting of crackers outside, but so much was the jubilation that its video recordings were enjoyed much later also often shown in the local television networks. We had brought out a compilation of patriotic songs in various languages of Sikkim and the best was 'Vande Bharatam', which was also the name of the album. That was two decades ago we celebrated the Golden Jubilee of India's Independence in an unprecedented way and unparalleled manner so far, the memory of which still lingers fresh to cherish forever not only me but many who were part of such a magnificent celebration! 

The month of August is, however, best remembered personally for two reasons of my life that gave a headstart to my career bringing in something meaningful to take me further on. It has been one of my life changing months to see me entering the second phase having completed my studies two years back but without any employment even in Sikkim. It was the year 1971 second day of this month found myself reporting to join my first ever job - not in Sikkim nor in any part of India or Nepal but in remote corner of the Himalayas to be in the wilderness of the Manas Game Sanctuary as its Game Warden with His Majesty's Royal Government of Bhutan. My education (having done M.Sc. in Zoology 1969 North Bengal University) and love for Nature took me there across the river Manas which was in turbulant spate to cross over in a ferry boat. A year later same date my return was fated but after drenched fully from a rising wave in the last lap that nearly swept off all five of us in the boat. It could not be anything less than a miracle to save me without the knowledge of swimming even to survive in the event of  a mishap. It was a heart touching good bye from the forests that gave me all the experience to be amidst nature through all the seasons one could dream of. Only regret I have with the place is that I could not see a tiger though often ventured out with a Dukpa forest guard in search of one to have a glimpse to the place nearby the animal frequented as we had placed salt-lick blocks previously (except once when we confronted a herd of wild boars.) Not even from the tree-top house we constructed though visitors coming for a day or two were more fortunate that way. Pug marks around my residence  were the only thing seen next morning suggesting of tiger visiting there the previous night. Project Tiger, an attempt to save the Indian tiger from extinction, was not started as yet and I remember Kailash Sankhala (1925-1994) naturalist and conservationist best known for his works in preserving tigers, had visited once when there. More from Wikipedia "Kailash Sankhala  was the first conservationist who raised his voice in favour of protecting them. Project Tiger is a tiger conservation programme launched in 1973 by the Government of India during Prime Minister Indira Gandhi's tenure. The project aims at ensuring a viable population of Bengal tigers in their natural habitats and also to protect them from extinction, and preserving areas of biological importance as a natural heritage forever represented as close as possible the diversity of ecosystems across the tiger's distribution in the country." He has some six books on tiger to his credit. It was interesting to read about Tiger in the Times of India online on August 15, 2017 'India: An unauthorised biography of people, events, policies' - "We bring you the energy, fluidity and unpredictability of the seven decades post independence and the promise of the future." India@70 included at number "14 - Tiger, tiger burning bright - Project Tiger, India's flagship conservation project began in 1973 when tigers were in decline, their number guesstimated at 1,800. Despite setbacks that saw their number drop to 1,411 in 2006, the project has achieved. ...At last count India had 2,226 tigers - the number is growing!" 

It was fascination for the Manas brought to limelight by E.P. Gee and his discovery Golden Langur mentioned in his classic book 'The Wildlife of India' (1964) we read in M.Sc. Wikipedia  has some more to share here - "Edward Pritchard Gee (1904–1968) was a Cambridge educated, Anglo-Indian tea-planter and an amateur naturalist in Assam, India. He is credited with the 1953 discovery of Gee's golden langur. He is notable as an early influential wildlife conservationist, especially for his 1959 and 1963 surveys and recommendations resulting in the creation of Chitwan National Park, the first of nine national parks in Nepal.He is famous for his discovery of the langur species which is named after him, Gee's golden langur. He had heard reports of an unusual coloured primate and he organised an expedition in 1953. He managed to film the langurs near the Sankosh River on the border between Assam and Bhutan. Nehru's forward to Gee's book in February 1964 was one of the only pieces he ever wrote on wildlife conservation. In it he said, 'Life would become very dull and colourless if it did not have these magnificent animals and birds to look at and to play with.' Nehru called for more refuges for vanishing wildlife, but he died in May and Gee died four years later. It was the end of an era." 

My batch-mates in the Royal Sikkim Civil Service viz., Badri Nath Sharma*, Madan Kumar Chettri, Tashi Topden* and Norbu Dadul Chingapa  were already there in the (Lal Bahadur Shastri) National Academy of Administration at Mussoorie on the day I was returning from Bhutan. It was possible for me to be there a week later on the 9th day of August. This date 45 years ago in 1972 reporting there as the Probationer for two years' course was also reckoned as the date of my joining the Government of Sikkim. It was a long tenure of 35 odd years full of dedicated efforts to contribute something till the end though not without some tribulation. Life is neither always of smooth sails nor to be swept off that easily also. The lesson learnt from the mighty Manas that bad farewell overflowing all over me with great gusto!

Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.     

With schools closing for the vacation many families found it best season to spend with their kids together. Some had their parents from back home in India join them as well. Fortunate were those who could take their time out with their family to best destinations unmindful of what was the weather likely there around. Many go to nearby beach as they want to unwind best away from hustle bustle of life. They would not mind adding a close friend or two to make the long weekend trip more enjoyable. More the merrier as we know. This we did while going on vacation in Florida last time to Outer Banks and previously to Long Island or Martha's Vineyard. What more to wish if the trip was Institute-sponsored with some conference organized in places with tourist interests to keep their guests entertained even while at work for some part of their stay away from home.
 
Yet a couple of days or even a fortnight away vacationing was not the remedy one could expect out while the whole summer was there to stay as long as it wished least bothered whether holidays ended or not. So the best way for many to enjoy seemed to be stay home with all comforts at your hands and let the kids know the facts of life as most of the people do back home. Children are sent to camps and some learn dance Indian classical style as well. Unmindful of hot summer days, people send their kids to India to remain connected to the roots. Some parents go along while others send them with someone going there and follow later for a fortnight to escort back. Such kids are fortunate to have the best (summer) of  both the worlds.

Health conscious would not mind the hot weather as they were seen walking/running around while kids playing in the community park and some enjoying swimming. Mothers taking out their babies in stroller while some cycling out long distance tracks constructed to link far away places gradually developed over the years to the benefit of residents as a social responsibility to the community.  Yet you find many doing rounds shopping at the mall for recoup their household needs while elders taking dog out to stretch their legs allowing the pet to benefit as well. It was also time to see hot air balloon in the sky and some venturing out high in the sky paragliding to enjoy the fine evening around this season with long days and sun set around 8.30. 

Lucky are also those kids whose parents are caring enough to provide them playing facilities inside and outside their home. Driveway is refurbished and  seen converted into basketball-cum-volleyball court while some have the net-posts to play football. Kids enjoy skates, bikes and cycling is the thing they love and seen doing rounds in the community. They are sent for swimming and martial art classes. Frisbee  and water bottle were seen given free to kids but with some message as advertisement during the Annual Block Party we went. Otherwise, the Spring Fair at Exton was full of games enticing children to gamble with toys as baits with three chances for five dollars - quite costly but crowds were seen enjoying the fun being game there. Fidget spinner was the new thing kids enjoyed seen coming here this time and seemed to be a craze world over. 

We are best kept busy with the baby so sweet to watch her grow every day unnoticed but find more charming than the previous day. In her own little way she tries to win our heart all the time, be it smiling or even crying - for us to enjoy looking forward for more to come each passing day as seasons change. 
Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.      

This being our yet another trip to the USA, we could have the opportunity to be  familiar with more places around to have idea how fast this place is developing and the changes with new additions in the neighbourhood. First thing was the lush greenery everywhere  we could see out of what barren land with stark naked trees due to snowy winter weather we left the place last time. With flowers of all kinds welcoming the Spring season heralding the better days ahead but not that easily. We had some weeks together with showers to cool the temperature to give the impression that winter was not yet over and leaving us so easily. Sometimes it made think if there would be fine weather at all with hot summer days taking over. Soon the vast stretches of land with plants and yellow flowers everywhere dried up and bales of hay were seen lying around being made by converting dried up forage plants there strewn. Another stretch was already lavish green covered with corn plants about to mature and ready to be harvested during this span. A plot of such land opposite of the road we take coming out of the community was to be developed into another residential area. This would make commuting time for those going to work  escalate as already a number of vehicles pass through before we take our turn there. Another such a community nearing completion with new road was found coming up next to the community we stayed in Exton during our first visit in 2010. One Sunday afternoon we were for lunch with Sheshadri-Nisha and her parents, who welcomed our little baby with traditional welcome Tika. It was nice of new mother to offer some cash on puja thali to reciprocate in gratitude as per our custom. We had very appetizing south Indian food to taste though myself kept off spicy items. May be wondering what of such cuisine without spices - yes, curd rice and payasam helped me a lot, rest was just for tasting rather testing the dish served all others enjoyed the best!

It was quite pleasant to find rows of beautifully constructed similar looking town homes on both the sides while passing through Fringetree Drive of West Whiteland nearby. Many other new communities had come up and were already part and parcel of the life of the people here. Outstanding common feature of these developments seem to be the Indian population. It would not be much of a surprise if you find local community parks crowded with their children as also the grocery shops by parents. Earlier there was one by the name Himalaya Indian store but now Bhawani and some others have come up in and around Exton. Same with the restaurant serving Indian cuisine that has multiplied over the period and people would not mind travelling that distances in search of authentic taste. Even Americans have developed a taste for Indian food served less spicy. Started with Indian Hut, we now have Indian restaurant with names like Deccan Biryani, Devi, Bangles, Ruchi and Tabla besides Nala and Spice,which serve Indian and Thai combined. Latest to join the race was with the name Manam, a word that reads same from front and back. Very much like the word Malayalam and the word we had for our group at Rhenock way back in 1963. Named after the famous Navjivan Trust Gandhiji started, it also read same in Nepali/Hindi - Navjivan Sandhya Club!
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Restaurants here serve water with ice or no ice to welcome as the guest is ushered in and shown the table to sit. Contrary to the common notion that the people in America drink a lot of beer and only beer for water even but apparently it is not so here. Many of these places whether Indian or Chinese do not serve liquor at all. At the most some restaurants have beer in their menu under beverages mainly of mocktails non-alcoholic. There are beer bars for those who love and found on sale during Annual Block Party we joined with many games for children. When we first came here we had small breweries with draft beer like Iron Hill Brewery and Restaurant and another was Victory Brewing Company that has grown popular with its brand name Victory.  Incidentally, there has been a spurt in beer bars as well with as many as six that came up in the neighbourhood around this summer. World of Beer was the first this season while one fine Sunday noon we found ourselves in an open beer garden just started. Developed in sprawling lawns where barns and stables used to be there earlier and named as Levante at the Stables. Learnt that it was an 1840 farmhouse/stable where  the rawness of the original stable was preserved with simply built a 32-tap bar around it. Not only their own beers, but Pennsylvania (PA) wines and some mixed PA cocktails as well served. Food trucks, close to two acres of outdoor seating and lounging and a chill atmosphere. Planned to be open through the summer, the satellite might remain open year-round the way they are going ahead well received.                                                                                                               (To be continued)

Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.

With many of the places around seen during our previous sojourns we were happy staying home rather than brave out in hot weather which we come across outdoors these days here. Preoccupied, there was no question of ourselves reaching out to near and dear ones even as they were all busy with life meeting day to day schedule of routine works their own and priorities. It is a matter of few hours to spare and be with it but taking out time was the major concern. Long due with months together already here, ourselves not in a position to reach them so far nor see any such possibility in near future too. Staying home did help us some way as many came visiting from far and wide each weekend. Appreciate much those who acknowledged our position and deferred meeting to a future date unknown. Cordiality in relations is, however, maintained by talking over the phone which is easy these days, if one cares. Such a formality is not necessary if there is well understanding between the two. Reciprocal visits add fun and/or eases of what becomes otherwise - always at the receiving end. We could not term it as inconvenience straight away yet it was if comes often. Simple it might seem but not so - could be the age factor that was taking a toll or was it our health to incapacitate us entertaining all the while. Not in habit of talking much otherwise also in our nature, we often find mere being courteous even as a formality, a tiring exercise. Zeal and enthusiasm not lacking as before but energy comes on our way sometimes making us feel sluggish. Unable to understand but undeniable that something was lacking in us to be as good as before. This was not the age to enjoy all the good things coming late for us in spite of best of intentions rather longings all the life. Such realities of life one cannot escape but face whatever came our way as a matter of fact simply to name it as fate. Much attention and time all diverted to the little one as she deserved more and more as she grew day by day in order to enjoy the bliss of being grandparents.
 
Weekend means visiting places nearby to unwind for the days ahead until the next weekend came again but not much with us this time. We were kept indoors most of the time with the baby taking much of our attention, love and care as well naturally. Whatever little spare time came to our hands was utilized in visiting some shopping malls if not places of interest nearby like Chester Springs Creamery that gave much needed glimpse of farm life for the people here who were not acquainted with such rural life. Children had access to and fun time playing with animals like cow, goat, sheep, poultry, etc. but could also see the fruits and vegetables grown there. Thereafter you could have the taste of yummy ice-creams made from milk obtained and named after each of the cow there. You could also buy some fresh organic  eggs, fruits and green vegetables as well.
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In one such weekend was the visit of our relatives from Gangtok who had come to meet their son in New York City. Apart from visiting his cousin Sundari spending her days with daughter  Urwashi and son-in-law Bikash near Philadelphia, they thought it worthwhile to drop in to our place also as a part of their itinerary. It was Urwashi who had earlier invited  Rachna-Vimal  home for dinner one weekend and to their utter surprise that turned out to be the first baby shower with friends like Dr. Manjari Moktan from Mirik, Christine P. Bhutia from Kalimpong, Lhakpa Lhamu from Gangtok besides others there. Sundari and Urwashi-Bikash were later with us when Bindiya, Priya and friends had another surprise function of baby shower for Rachna soon after we arrived here. Soon thereafter Sundari with Urwashi-Bikash came to our place and had informed that Shanti Daju and Sabitri Bhauju with elder son Gyanendra were coming to the US to see their younger son Dr. Anup. They would be visiting them and interested to meet us all here. Thus it was a great family get-together away from our homeland. Since they had a plan to see Washington D.C. next day, early dinner was in mind but stayed on to reach back home late night. Long summer day with sunset around 8.30 p.m. we could not believe that they were here all that long and our meeting was full of fun and joy to share together its memories to treasure lifelong!
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Shanti Daju and Sabitri Bahuju had recently been enjoying life much visiting places back home nearby Kalimpong-Darjeeling as well as Guwahati-Shillong . They stopped at New Delhi for a couple of days en-route to the US and in return journey at Dubai. Anup was surprised of not having met at all before in Gangtok and asked his father since how long  we knew each other. Right from our school days was the answer. Shanti Daju from Underground Villa and me from Happy Cottage and Development Area/Gangtok used to be sparsely populated those days. Going to the same school and playing on the same playground in front of our residence in 1950s we had many reminiscences from our student life to share about. Later on in pursuing our own life and career, we used to meet sometimes  but more often in social gatherings. He was the person to be seen attending most of the social functions and familiar with many of our relatives in both side of the Teesta. He seemed to be the connecting link between the Newar families there in Sikkim as well as outside in Darjeeling Hills. When I mentioned this to him and enquired whether he still continued the same way like in good old days, he said that age and health did not permit it any more. I best remember Chandra Jyoti Daju* (more popularly known as CJ) of Melli-Kerabari from the other side who similarly used to be seen attending in such social functions often.He left us soon after his trip to Nepal attending one of his social obligations as he had not been keeping well of late that took him to New Delhi where he breathe his last. He was an amiable and charming personality. We met him last at Namthang Kothi attending the wedding of  Dharma Pratap's son - the scion of Rai Saheb Bal Krishna Pradhan better known for his fabled "Baburamko baja". CJ was known since our school days when he worked for sometime with the Sikkim Mining Corporation at Rangpo in 1960s. He used to invite us to his place whenever we met and could make it once when returning together after attending our sister Chanda's daughter Alka at Melli Danra. During my posting as the District Collector (South) in Namchi, I had the rare opportunity to visit and pay respect to Bhuwan Prasad Pradhan* at Shumbhuk Kothi and to CJ Daju at Kerabari first time with my parents. My Muma remembers Bhuwan Daju to be similarly a person in days of yore as the connecting link between the family of Taksari Chandrabir Pradhan at Rhenock and that of Taksari Lakshmi Das Pradhan on the other side of the Teesta since he used to visit Rai Saheb Ratna Bahadur Pradhan* quite often to seek his valued advice on personal matters as well. Their outstanding contributions immense together in making what Sikkim is today might have gone into oblivion but their name and fame had spread out far and wide like the fragrance from the flowers of the fabled Chandra Nursery the world over. I would not be fair  without a line in tribute remembering the contribution also of Moti Chand Pradhan* and Rai Saheb Hari Prasad Pradhan* on land both sides of the Teesta while that of the latter beyond to the neighbouring kingdom of Nepal in 1950s. He is much remembered even today for his landmark contributions laying foundation of the judiciary system during King Tribhuvan's tenure being invited on recommendation of the prime minister Bisheshwar Prasad Koirala* and later appointed as the first Chief Justice by King Mahendra.
 
It would be interesting to share here an anecdote when Bikash posted a picture of Urwashi carrying the baby as his Facebook status next day. His friends started congratulating them for being blessed with a baby. Matter settled down only after he clarified whose baby she was with. Such  misunderstanding also happened with another family visiting us who posted similarly on his Facebook page. That too needed a clarification to stop the flood of congratulatory remarks. While posting on Facebook a word or two in description could have helped avoid/save from such an awkward situation and to know the place visited as well!

Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.

To break the monotony, rather out of fondness we take baby out for a drive. Otherwise also, she has to visit pediatrician for routine check up as we are keen to know if everything going on well for her. Growth being the major concern which is a natural process that takes its own course, but we are curious to know if baby is gaining weight and height. Apparently she is as we find some of her garments and socks suddenly gone small and pyjamas shorter. Yet a weekly visit for checking the weight only could well be taken care of by bringing a weighing scale home to keep a close watch after bath almost daily. Accurate is the weighing but for measuring the height we trust the clinic as we think it being not done correctly with body or the measuring tape not stretched properly. It was quite heartening to hear from the doctor baby had grown like a champ in past one month. We could also see the difference physically as well. Every little change in behaviour is so interesting when she follows things shown or sound from rattles. But the most to charm her way best is little smile she gives back in response to make my day without forgetting the cute protruding mouth for the feed she needs every time she feels hungry. This makes me rush to her mamma before baby gets angry! 

New mother checks app in her cellphone whether it is time to feed with last done noted. I tell her growing baby needs feeding more frequently as and when her body demands and need not necessarily be every two hours or so. It depends if baby emptied her bowel or even before sleeping little feed needed to satisfy and comfort of mother's lap. When she gives me back, baby opens her eyes  a little to see who the person carrying her. Behaviours like this and her alertness getting disturbed even from little sound makes me believe that Mother Nature has gifted her sharp intelligence being a good girl all the while otherwise. The  app is useful to keep the record of baby growing with each event right from feeding with quantity and/or time taken to pooping with colour and consistency.
 
Another app her father  uses helps make baby sleep. It is all music pleasing to the ears but not as effective as mother's lullaby and the best which she picked up from her mother very recently only. Phupu loves to sing "Chanda hai tu, Mera suraj hai tu..." another lovely number by Lata (Aradhana 1969 S. D. Burman, Anand Bakshi) whenever she is with the baby. Simply humming is often found doing magic when baby really needs a sleep. Otherwise, talk to baby when awake and enjoy how she responds if in mood.
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There are many useful baby products available online to make parents happy more than baby herself. Besides an attachment with some colourful toys, light and music to keep busy while in the crib, outside she can be put in a sleeper with vibration that lull baby to sleep. Even a little gym is there to strike the piano rid to play different musical notes each time baby hits it while moving her legs cycling.It also has a mirror hung above an arch with some toys swinging. Mirror is believed to help baby improve recognitive quality by reflection while back home traditionally showing a mirror is supposed to delay her talking ability rather turn dumb. Mother herself fond of reading, her baby too has a good collection of little and miniature books held with book-ends on the table to start the library. Besides 'First 100 Words' and 'Baby Touch and  Feel :  Animals', popular titles like 'The Very Hungry Caterpillar', 'Snow White' and 'Sleeping Beauty' are also included. Reading aloud  a book to  baby from very early age helps in many ways. As per kidshealth.org "benefits of Reading aloud - a. teaches a baby about communication. b. introduces concepts such as numbers, letters, colors, and shapes in a fun way. c. builds listening, memory, and vocabulary skills. d. gives babies information about the world around them."
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As a baby-seat in the car is mandatory and the law is - "Children under age 4 must be properly secured in a child restraint system in the rear seat, if possible. They must then ride in a booster seat until they turn 8, weigh more than 80 lbs., or are taller than 4 feet 9 inches. Violation of the child restraint law is a standard offense." The rule is - "All children whose weight or height exceeds the forward-facing limit for their car seat should use a belt-positioning booster seat until the vehicle seat belt fits properly, typically when they have reached 4 feet 9 inches in height and are 8 through 12 years of age." Seat is rear facing helps see someone beside till the age of four and thereafter front facing so that mother can see on the mirror while driving the car herself. She can drive a car two weeks after the delivery. Here the company she works for allowed maternity leave of six weeks and another two weeks more for facilitated delivery while paternity leave was just two weeks only. Both the parents take class on parenting and also  learn how to give a bath to the baby and change a diaper. 

My online search led me to the article "These 10 countries have the best parental leave policies in the world" mentioning "America does plenty of things well, but paid parental leave isn't one of them. Out of the world's 196 countries, the US is one of only four that has no federally mandated policy to give new parents paid time off. That burden is placed on individual states and employers. But some countries really prioritize the well-being of new parents — both straight and same-sex — granting them more than a year of leave at full pay. If you're thinking of starting a family, here are the ideal places to call home...." Finland, Denmark, Sweden and most of the European countries made the list. Further, fortune.com said "India’s New Maternity Leave Policy Puts the U.S. / rest of the world to Absolute Shame.  - India's new 26 weeks of paid maternity leave surpasses France's 16-week leave and easily bests the 14 weeks available in Germany and Japan. If India was an OECD country it would rank sixth, alongside Israel and Poland, for longest paid leave. Only the U.K., Greece, Ireland, the Slovak Republic and the Czech Republic offer new mothers more paid time off." United Kingdom (52), Greece (43), Ireland (42), Slovak Republic (34) and Czech Republic (28) comes before India, Israel and Poland with 26 weeks and next is Hungary (24) while the USA (0) last.

Life returns to normal with mother back-to-work earliest making colleagues happy asking when she was bringing  baby to meet them. Baby is given to baby care whole day if parents can not afford some other arrangement home like caring grand parents or otherwise. Along with the car-seat a stroller helps a lot to take baby easily while moving around for shopping or other errands besides evening walk. When we had brought a perambulator/pram from New Delhi for our baby now a proud mother, it was something new to flaunt in the community. Seeing the one now used, in which the car-seat also fits in, that seems to be mere a prototype  yet quite functional enough to lull baby to sleep inside at night. Here some people take baby for a drive to make her sleep even at night. No need as we find our baby improved a lot in recent days. What more one could wish but pray the baby a smooth flow with passage of every moment of life to bring the best out for all of us so blessed!

Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.

Life has not been  the same ever since we were blessed with the baby to keep us busy most part of the day and night as well. With her comes the memories back to our younger days when we had our kids born to fill our world with joy. Those were the days when life was not as complex as we find it today. With our knowledge limited to whatever read little about the parenthood but much learnt more with own experience handling the situation as it came before us. With information galore to be accessed over the internet at the click of the mouse these days, sometimes present day parents found them yet not enough to cope with the little problems cropping up every now and then each passing day. Parenthood is not just bearing a child or two but facing every little issue that comes up with in the phase of life just entered into. Rearing the baby up with enough care and love coming through the challenges brought along before the young parents is not simple and easy. Overcoming little nuances of the life with success brings confidence and courage within to face the rest ahead. Best way,  therefore,  was to cross the bridge as we came across.

Seeing the little bundle of joy immense makes me wonder how the Mother Nature has given the creatures including we human beings the power of procreation. It is equally surprising to find that the newborn soon to be resembling her parent in features in a unique way sometimes, that too so perfectly. That might be the reason many ask which of the parent baby resembles to and later as s/he grows we compare after whom goes in behaviour or characteristic features. Even it makes her grandma believe she is like herself as a baby. When this baby came to our world, the most remarkable thing to know that she was not with usual wrinkle-like rawness in face and had eye-lashes long with hair in black and plenty to catch my attention first. Each day the new born grew different to look at as many say but slowly and gradually she started learning to cope with life in her own little way. Taking on each day as it comes with which she entered to have a place of her own in this world. She announced her arrival crying loud and fists closed to surge ahead with time, the future unknown. First thing a baby knows is to suck from her mother's breast oozing with maternal bliss that first few minutes giving all the strength and immunity that a new life needs coming here. No need was there to feed the baby with glucose water though water itself is not given for six months. Soon thereafter she gets a bath to cleanse herself to take life all afresh crying though for next feed needed to recoup the energy spent thus. Welcomed to her family with purification and initiation rituals, all congratulating the happy mother as well as proud father whose long time dream together comes true to life at last!
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It was a surprise indeed to notice only recently that she already started smiling back when prompted. That wonderful moment we had been looking forward from the little bundle of joy to fill our heart immense. Little princess has of late been playful too as she enjoys feed leisurely - sometimes more out of thirst than actual hunger. What a noise otherwise creates when she is really hungry giving us no time to heat the milk frozen mother has pumped out  to meet such an exigency when she is away. Sometimes at night sudden cry quite baffles what all went wrong with her system. Could be the colic pain she gets trying digest the feed that comes out in reflux occasionally. A lot of uneasiness that even disturbs the father equally surprised with the accuracy baby wakes up of her own when it is time for next feed. She starts gurgling noise moving her hands furiously to wake up mother from sleep. By this time her mittens found  sucked little wet. During the day when awake she looks face lit up bright and mouth pouted up indicating she wants to be fed. Little delay  in changing the diaper makes her uncomfortable, furious and frustrated even. Once fed to her satisfaction with a burp or two out brings her soon to have another round of sleep but not before some time to play if she wishes. Such is the marvel Mother Nature bestowed in us. Sleep brings all the things to rest to refill our life with energy bringing in much needed vigour and zest in us for the next thing challenging to face rejuvenated. It is most difficult time when the baby cries continuously at night and every effort seems to have failed to pacify her. Much patience and effort is equally needed to make her sleep. Everyone tries his/her own way for baby to sleep. My friend Mani* used to make the new mother herself as a little baby sleep singing the melody "Aao tumhe chand pe le jayen, pyar bhare sapane sajayen, chhota sa bangla banayen, ek nayi duniya basayen..." (Lata Mangeshkar, Zakhmee 1975 Bappi Lahiri, Gauhar Kanpuri.) It is a Christmas song new father exclaims as the song has tagline "Jingle bell, jingle bell ..." as well. Same song besides other lullaby of Nepali nursery rhymes including her own composition grandmother sings for this baby to sleep. Even mother finds baby doing magic out of her grandfather as he started humming and not so lucky herself hearing him ever before. So worried with baby's crying at night, with no option left we resort trying some traditional way to ward off evil eye unknown that might have been the reason behind such a disturbing behaviour. Some might say such a step superstitious but it helps sometimes, others opine.
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To be continued next week

​Since the bundle of joy immense came to our life out of the wedlock uniting a Newar and a Nair family, the couple had well planned to make the joyous moment blessed by customs and rituals of the both the sides. While the Newars have many rituals to rejoice the occasion right from the news coming of daughter's conception with Dhau-Baji Nakegu/Dahi-Chiura Khuwaune we started with followed by that of tenth day with sixth day combined making it simple. Baby's name was decided well before by the mother as her prerogative - she being after all a mother to take all the brunt right from conceiving to delivering ultimately with much understanding hubby always beside her  all through. No need was felt for 'Nauran'/naming ceremony with some Pundit invited. As for making 'Tippan'/horoscope like we had done for our kids, we had the time recorded by the hospital heard the announcement with musical ring that fateful morning of the auspicious day waiting in the hospital lounge. This was also mentioned in the Birth Certificate, which was enough for the purpose. With this known, horoscope-making was left with her in-laws back home at Palakkad in Kerala to take care of in most appropriate way deemed necessary to get 'janma-kundali' for their 'sundhari kutty'. Simply the new arrival seeing the light of the day on her mother's birthday was enough for us to bring home the joy utmost and fate sublime. For her it was the best possible birthday gift ever she could dream of! What more we could hope as it was the happiest day ever since we married off our daughter - All because two souls fell in love!
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Besides the security and name tags for the new born, her foot print was also taken for record and given to the parents. Identical name tag at mother's wrist was tallied every time baby was brought back from the Nursery room for feeding needed at night. Many people love to have the ink-impressions of  hand as well along with baby's photograph for record and as a room decoration as well.We chose 4th of July the date for this present day ritual for the baby with the tag Born in the US of America. A photographer was available in the hospital to give professional service for baby's photos even though friends and relatives visiting take many with the baby and proud parents there. Bouncing back to life, few weeks later another professional was hired for photography session that lasted for four hours at a stretch to give that wonderful results to cherish for long. Her patience with sleeping baby and pains to take shots all possible ways brought us some brilliant results that impressed the photographer, a mother of four kids, herself too. How could the grandparents go without, they too get photographed with the baby and her proud parents together.  
Birth certificate was received within a week  baby arrived in our world and next step was to apply for a passport to ease little angel's travel home-bound at an earliest to meet all there waiting eagerly.
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Only mother knows the pain and joy as well of being adored with the supreme power of nature bringing a new life to the earth by the virtue of motherhood only a woman can experience and deliver. To give birth to her own kind, a baby girl is the rare experience not all can achieve and here our daughter was delivering on the first opportunity itself. We parents feel  amply rewarded for the long wait all these years. Nature has at last been so generous enough to bless us all. It is perhaps for this reason they have maternal pattern of society for the Nairs and many others in Kerala. Very much like the one we have in Meghalaya from the north east region of the country, while our own in Nepal with some families still have to come out of the clutches of social stigma attached. As per custom there, when a baby is born the joy is shared with the mother's family by sending - betel nuts 12 nos., jaggery one block, fennel 200 grams, ghee one packet, ginger one piece, salt one piece, nutmeg 12 nos. with some vermilion. If a baby girl, all these items but nuts, nutmeg and jaggery are sent in broken halves to know so easily. Was this sign by any means related to broken halves of the coconut for the Peredhil ceremony of the Nair?! These are sent on a bronze or any other plate with leaf and are sent back with equal quantity added. When we were in Kathmandu last time, Ranjana's niece was narrating the pain being in patriarchal society her experience bearing a daughter each time half a buffalo head was sent as per family's custom. For the second one and to baffle one whole buffalo head was  sent instead in anguish. Both of  her daughters are growing smart doing very well than their cousins to make the mother proud of and to prove everyone all wrong.
 
'The supreme happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved.' We had to wait for almost a month for the naming ceremony as per the custom followed by the Nair family, which is known as Peredhil, held  on the 28th Day of the birth known as Noolukettu in Malayalam. Elder brother Vipin with Swapna and Arnav  had come all the way from Houston, Texas to be with the family and bless the new-born on this auspicious occasion. As the scheduled flight was cancelled they had to stay overnight in a hotel at the airport but they could catch early flight next morning to be here on time for the ceremony.

Whatever name you give, this way or that, the baby is  yours always. In our system, Nauran is done on 5th or11th day for girl while it is 6th or 12th day for boy. Whereas Peredhil is usually done on 28th day for girls and on 27th for boys - significant to note the weightage changed.  Simple was the naming ceremony of Peredhil when the parents in their traditional attire were seated on the floor with bare baby in mother's lap. In their front was the auspicious lamp with kalash and puja thali with betel leaves and broken halves of coconut in front of them. Besides a tray with some customary articles like jadi-butti (nutmeg, majhiphal, dried stem and root pieces), black holy threads, black  bangles and panch-dhatu anklets sent by grandparents in Palakkad especially for the ceremony. Black holy thread was tied around the waist of the baby decorated with bangles and anklets. Highlight of the naming ceremony was when it was mother first to whisper the name in baby's right ear with left one covered with betel leaf and repeating it in the other with one covered. Next was father's turn to do so with rest of the family members following thereafter.

Since it was a week day, a typical Malayalam feast waited for friends invited for dinner. Not only the menu was elaborate with all delicacies home-made right from sambhar, pachadi made of pineapple, kooto curry of black gram, kalan tusi of horse gram and pumpkin, thoran of cabbage, ada payasam, avial of mixed vegetable, olan of mango, injipuli of mango and ginger, achar of raw mango, banana chips, sharkara uppiri besides papadam. All were seated on the floor and meal was served on banana leaf. Wondered how these leaves were arranged - these plastic ones were brought all the way from Palakkad by the in-laws during last visit especially for such traditional functions. When visiting Kerala in 2014 we had the rare opportunity to have a taste of these delicious preparations besides kind hospitality from the Nair family. So it was but natural for us to look forward quite eagerly to have the taste once again as such occasions come very rare. Our knowledge in this regard being limited to dosa, idli, sambar, wada, rasam and to the most papadam, our daughter who had by now familiarized herself with the cuisine all these years helped to get the names listed above. It being very common to see a tulsi-math in courtyard of every Hindu home in Kerala, we were not surprised to find that non-vegetarian items excluded in this ceremony like in all their religious rituals. This is quite in contrast with the Newars as we have meat, fish and wine for every occasion of joy right from naming ceremony to that of sorrow (while purification ritual done) as well when we give 'sagan' with all those items. Even alcoholic beverage was, as such, not served on this occasion as well. Otherwise also most of the present on this occasion were not in habit of consuming intoxicating drinks. Such a practice is, however, not a taboo but an essential part of many rituals and every festivity back home in our society. Most remarkable contrast with ours is that for the Malayalam Hindu family beef is not something to shun. It is understood to be very much a part of their culture to relish like the fish they love so much. Friends are surprised to find that while beef is a taboo, buffalo meat is popular with many in Nepal.
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Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.

As life slowly but gradually moves ahead, it has to adopt various means to enter into with processes we usually practise as a part of the rituals of the society we are in. Marriage brings two souls together and the rest is story to steer ahead into future hopeful. Soon / not so soon the couple is blessed with a child to bind them together to face more challenges that make new life of realities with the bundle of joy immense added in the family. She/he is the centre of attraction with attention of all there whenever baby cries out every one reaches to see what has happened. "Unless a baby cries out even mother would not feed her" is the common maxim when some voice in protest is raised against something going wrong in the society - how appropriate!

Home they bring the little doll, a bundle of joy immense swaddled and cuddled up in the car-seat (without which hospital authorities would not hand you over the baby) waiting whole morning to be welcomed by the  drizzle auspicious many like us believe so. Parents usher in the little goddess home. We welcome them with traditional 'mangal ghat' at the doorway and offer prayer for their well-being like done back home. New-born in the hospital gets a tag around the wrist as identity with identical band for mother as well. She already had one computer printed while getting admitted and also the person accompanying her gets one. Girl Shresta is the name hospital gave to the new born for this purpose. Of the other two bands one with QR code on her right leg is for the hospital records while the other on the left security tag - anyone trying to take the baby out of the room it starts giving beep sound as alarm to alert all there. Soon thereafter the baby gets the name mother had in mind ever since she came across the word while reading books she loves to. She started with typical Newar names with quite fascinating ones like Rajmati, Lahana, Lasata, Palpasa, Hisila, Nugah, Khusi, etc.  she also looked for Hindu/i names even besides many other choices but the decision ultimately arrived at was to match their life here. As for her own name, even today people ask whether the name Rachna (her grandfather gave) she got it first or the other way round after the much loved bookshop Rachna Books. Raman loves it best to leave unanswered to make his friends perplexed as ever before. Very much like the riddle "whether egg came first or the hen" though many believe it being named after her. Like her brother, she too is fond of reading right from thumb-sucking childhood and in the first opportunity gets cuddled in her room with a book to read. After reaching the target of 40 books in the previous year, she had 50 this time but it was something different though. Her own life story - preparing for the bundle of joy - best was to look forward the untold to unfold. Four months through the expectant mother could know that she was rearing up inside her body the baby girl dreamt of since long - not without much hurdle of/or the ordeal life brings in. For us it was a dream come true in the real sense! 
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During the Book Preview of 'The Newars World~Wide Connecting the dots : Sikkim' held at Rachna, Ganesh had mentioned that in 150 years of the advent of the Newars in Sikkim, our third generation not yet through and very much amongst us unlike many who have reached twice or more the figure of their offspring within this period. While "the normal or average time between two such generations of a species: about 35 years for humans", our pace tells the story otherwise. We are slow breeders but proud to be so lucky as for ourselves many of us may not live that age to make our progeny that lucky enough. This we could easily attribute for our children getting married late and taking their own time even to procreate in spite of the fast pace with which life advances. Further, equally disturbing is the growing trend of one child pattern of nuclear family that has made the call from the concerned to have at least two children to cope with  challenges the state facing. This leaves many perplexed of those with more than one wife helping breed more. When young it was quite disturbing to find family with kids more than half a dozen - some added trying for a son while mine was opposite to see cousins trying for a daughter. How would they rear them all up at a time when things were not supposed to be quite easy. Coming this far, I find most of them well-settled with many if their next generation crossing the shores to find them here in the US and elsewhere as well. More the merrier as they all prove those believing small is beautiful all wrong. Delay breeds in contempt many raising eyebrows doubting the capability to procreate even. There are those trying their best with options available and all fertility facilities to seek help. Yet couples are deprived of a child to add number to the population clock. So,  motherhood is blissful supreme that makes many like me to be proud of to be thus fortunate enough convincing yet once again, better late than never as we all know!

Another thing to quiz many of young minds until their marriage and begetting offspring would certainly be doubting oneself if he/she possess the power to procreate  and have a child of their own. To prove oneself being potent could always make one have a child earliest but for this too one has to tie the marital knot as per accepted norm of the society. Worst comes worst, there is always the option to adopt a child. We have a case being blessed so, after years of such a wise step to be proud of coming thus far. A couple who lost their young school-going sons in a natural calamity could bring back the joy by reverting the surgery she had undergone before. Some babies are born premature for various health reasons but they too survive the initial struggle inside the incubator - not less than a miracle of the modern medical science - to come through and bring joy not only to the parents but entire family.Surrogacy is another method couple resort to for cases extreme and hopeful rush back home to avail the same considering the huge expenditure involved here. Life is beautiful to those who believe and appreciate. Unfortunate are those stories to hear of the sad loss due to negligence at the time of birth to leave all the dream shattered.
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Those were the days when it was not expected to dream about the baby before birth. "Nani paunu kahile kahile, kokro bunnu ahile" roughly equalizing to the maxim "cart before the horse." So in good old days, we did not talk and think much about the baby's swaddle as old cotton sari or soft muslin cloth in home would serve the purpose immediately and flannel sheets and other essentials were purchased later. 'Thangna' used to be norm of the day decorating the clothesline in the sun that indicated new arrival in the family to the neighbourhood. Diapers and wipes taking over to make life easy and convenient that helped save cleaning mess and washing clothes every time. This baby arrived home with everything needed planned and purchased all in advance understanding well that there would be hardly any time left to think about anything else than the baby and the baby alone! 
New born was not exposed much as the baby was kept aside the convalescing mother at least till the purification period and Nauran usually of 5 days for baby girl or 6 days for baby boy . Customarily, some perform this rite on 10th day or even on 11th day while some even on 4th day. Such function is, however, not done on Monday and Wednesday. If  it is first child  born in the family, Nauran is done by some on 4th day itself. In earlier days, soon after the delivery mother and baby were made to sit in the straw-mat. These days birth taking place in hospital, there is no such practice but some hay is put beneath the pillow symbolically. Both mother and baby are given bath and body massage by grandma twice a day right from the birth till 10th day purification. They are warmed by burning dried barks of sugarcane. Deities are worshipped and prasad/offering is kept at 12 different places of the house including the main entrance and rest of the sweets are distributed among the children. Thereafter, both father and mother are made to sit together when the baby is handed over to them. This is followed by the ritual of giving them Sagan. A feast is held to celebrate the occasion with close relatives invited.

We had this purification ritual on tenth day, a Sunday. New parents with the baby seated on the floor with twelve lighted diyas around, puja performed solemnly with 'sukunda' and 'kalash' praying for their well-being. Tika as our blessings to the new parents with garments given for the baby. Thereafter, Phupu was seated and baby given by father. She too gets a gift to mark the happy occasion. Before the lunch was served, customary auspicious Khen Sagan comprising of an egg, bara, fish, dry-meat, some lintels, ginger and garlic pieces, curd and wine was given first to new parents and to all present thereafter to celebrate the occasion. A new family life is thus augured and as we enter their home welcome note aptly announcing - All because two people fell in love!        ~~~
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Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.

Expectant mother reported to the hospital on appointed date and time that morning. Soon, we followed there in the visitors' lounge to wait for the momentous event of our life. Nisha was already there waiting before us. Announcement of the new arrival by ringing of a musical bell over the system made us quite excited. We did not believe and thought it was for other visitor already waiting there as she was taken to the labour room some while ago. Bindiya checked to confirm that the bell was for us only. She was restless thereafter and more eager to congratulate the parents and see the new-born baby so much so as to get inside to the anteroom time and again only to be rebuffed by matron with stern eyes through the spectacles from behind the closed glass-door of the welcome desk. They needed time to clean the new-born before handing over the baby to equally curious father who was standing next to do the honour of cutting the umbilical cord to detach the baby from mother's body. Recent study says, "Holding your partner's hand can ease their pain in labour room." Ours was much beyond! Back home such a practice is  beyond imagination and situation unfamiliar quite awkward. In joyous excitement, new father shared with us later that he happened to switch off the cellphone when giving it to the nurse for taking a video-shot of the rare opportunity he had. He was thrilled to cut with the scissors different more akin to that used in the kitchen. Like in Hindi movies, there was neither such announcement by doctor, who just helped deliver the baby, emerging out of the labour room congratulating the anxious father and relatives waiting outside to know whether it was a boy or girl and that both the mother and child doing well safe and sound.
 
Some more friends had gathered in the lounge by that time, not much to worry about with hospital accepting the situation and understanding our position as well. Since only two were allowed inside at a time as the new  mother was brought to the ante-room, Ranjana  was let in first to see them, me next. Bindiya and Nisha followed. What a joy to see the new-born with mother as fresh as could be being blessed thus. The tip her aunt (with a toddler) gave was to take care of herself as usual since visiting friends would be taking lots of photographs if she wished to look good and beautiful that proud moment. More than that, for me, it could be the supreme joy of motherhood attained/achieved - the great relief of having given birth to a new life to see the world after all those months together of difficult days and nights in discomfort. Mother with new born was shifted to another room to spend two more days convalescing. Bindiya had taken due care to decorate the room with Happy Birthday balloons and streamer to welcome them both sharing the same day - May 19. We had, in fact, celebrated her birthday previous night well knowing the due date coinciding.

Anxious wait started several months before preparing to welcome the new arrival. Unlike back home, here the parents-to-be could know that their bundle of joy was a baby girl. It was their prayer answered as there was no daughter born in the family before. Previous one for the elder son too was a son. I do not wish to link the episode in any way to the maternal aspect of the Nair society as my poor knowledge does not permit me to do so. In the Newar society, there is no distinction made whether the baby is a son or a daughter. Rather, we not only hold the daughter in high esteem worshipped as Goddess Kumari right from childhood and believed to be Goddess Laxmi incarnate. Even a husband considers his wife as a deity in later stage of their life together. Personally, we are fortunate enough to have been blessed with the both. At the wedding reception, an elder had said me that my Rachna was now gone out of our home and it was indeed quite a long wait welcoming home Sarvada as our daughter-in-law took some time to happen. Otherwise, even a son-in-law is highly regarded and believed to be an incarnation of Lord Narayan.
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When we were expecting our second baby, the size of the tummy made us believe to be blessed with twins. In our previous encounter, we were not aware that life would be at a turning point with a baby delivered the very next morning. Previous evening we had gone for a long walk to Naya Bazar/Mahatma Gandhi Road from the 8-Unit Quarter near the Happy Valley of Development Area. We had rushed to the STNM Hospital early next day that sunny Sunday morning getting into a taxi and were blessed with a son within hours. It was so simple and straight that made Sanu Mama* and Maiju surprised but also little annoyed taking things easy and not informing them in the morning so that he could have taken us to the hospital. It was a  normal delivery when Dr. Shanti Rai* had come to help safe birth in spite of being a holiday. We were home next day. Both my Buba* and Muma had come from Rhenock that very day to be with us while our domestic help thought it better to leave us to our fate. It was early winter/December and to keep new-born and mother warm, we had used charcoal the previous night. Sutkeri had to be rushed back to the hospital very next day as she had some problem probably due to suffocation as our room had no ventilation. Things got back to normal soon as we came home at Rhenock to escape severe winter days Ranjana convalescing and baby growing with love and care of all including three sisters there. 
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We were more careful next time with double the joy of hopefully being blessed with twins seeing the baby bump. She had, therefore, to be admitted in the hospital well in advance to be safe avoiding any eventuality of rushing there at night. This time too everything went off well and a baby was born five days later that summer afternoon on Saturday. Overjoyed to have a sister born, I took our son to get new garments - one with A B C and other with 1 2 3 printed. It was time for him to go to school soon. By the time we left for home, the hospital room and staff there turned quite familiar to thank the attending nurses with small gifts. So close to our hearts that whenever we happened to visit the private wards the room at the entrance brought us memories back to nostalgic days and nights spent waiting for the new arrival. Well, many changes have taken place there with some renovations but how could we forget the anteroom of the labour room we stayed. Those rooms are now used for gastro-enterology department which we visit to see Dr. Suresh Madan Rasaily whenever needed. They  celebrated 100 Years of STNM Hospital this year in a befitting manner. We were at pain some years ago when a move was there to do away with this heritage monument where not only our  memories rear cherished till this date but even some historical moments of life that brought cheers as well as sorrows to many like us. Then as secretary to the Department of Cultural Affairs and Heritage (for the second time in my 35+ years long career), I had suggested about and stressed our minister, who also happened to be in-charge of Health, the need to save/preserve/conserve such ancient monuments that Sikkim had very few to declare any construction more than 50 years old to deserve a heritage status requiring such conservation. He simply asked me to keep quiet or else be prepared to face some action again! My friend Dhruba shared on Facebook - "Maturity is walk away from people and situations that threaten your peace of mind, self-respect, values, morals and self-worth." That is what I did exactly in spite of a series of books brought out from our Karuna Devi Smarak Dharmarth Guthi titled "Heritage Conservation" by INTACH (Indian National Trust for Art and Cultural Heritage) with its Nepali translation "Dharohar Suraksha" by me besides "Motivation: Skills and Techniques".  These were released by dignitaries in a State function to celebrate the Commonwealth Day coinciding with World Women's Day in the year 2006. Incidentally, INTACH Sikkim Chapter is reportedly adjudged as the Best Chapter recently in recognition of their efforts towards the cause of natural and cultural heritage. A long journey indeed since the Sikkim Chapter was started with me as the Convener years ago, then had participated in 20 Years of the INTACH in New Delhi with R. P. Lama* my counterpart from Darjeeling. During his tenure they had brought out a list of their heritage living citizens as far as my memory goes but not much beyond to recollect their names.

Generation Next for our offspring is blessing to us as we see them something to look forward rearing up the child to experience a new life together as a couple. Many hopes and aspirations to take them forward together in life with as many challenges and things different and difficult compared to what we had. They have been moulded into thus more by time and compulsions of modern life like we had ourselves been to come through this age good and bad. We faced little early as being married before we turned 30 to be blessed with a baby soon so as to face the realities of life, sooner the better to be with it. It was not so with our children as they had their own life to live and a career to build in order to cope with all such eventualities. Our patience had paid at last and what could be the joy more rewarding than becoming grandparents at an age many see their grandchildren married and some with kids even - fortunate enough if one lives to this age! 

Disclaimer: This is author’s personal account of memories updated to cherish and treasure often on a detour here and there en route to share the joy of the journey called life. Some names (*asterisk for those no more), quotes, places and events mentioned are just to connect with and no malice whatsoever intended. He can be reached at shrestars@gmail.com. His latest "The Newars World~Wide Connecting the Dots : Sikkim" is available at Rachna Books.